Some leaders have a high level of natural, God-given, intuitive, emotional intelligence. They know how they feel and they understand how others feel. They can build connections based on those feelings, and everyone is the better for it.
I (Matt) did not receive that particular gift under the leadership Christmas tree. I went to school for more than 20 years, and nobody told me that emotional intelligence was more important than 10th-grade geometry. Talking about feelings wasn’t something that happened in my house growing up.
I’m not angry about it. I don’t blame anyone. But I have to admit that paying attention and prioritizing emotions was not on my radar for a long time as a leader. And the odds are that they may not be that big of a priority for you either.
And our failure to prioritize emotions - ours and those we lead - and a lack of development if emotional intelligence does not come naturally is costly. I would estimate that 80% of the interpersonal conflict that I have encountered as a leader is because someone was hurt because they didn’t feel heard or understood.
Think about that. Most of the problems that exist in our relationships come down to feelings, not facts. We can talk about ‘speaking truth in love’ ‘til the cows come home, but without emotional intelligence, people won’t believe we love them.
If you struggle to name your feelings or create problems for yourself as a leader by not prioritizing the feelings of others, this podcast episode will help you. Tal’s gonna share wisdom about emotional intelligence, depression, and the connection that exists between our mood, mindset, and momentum as a leader.
Life is hard. Leadership is painful. Without resilience, you’ll quit or hide when the chips are down. Listen to this episode, take action and make the change you need to be the best version of you as a leader.
In this episode you’ll discover:
- [Bonus] The exact medicine you need to take to kick a cold.
- The myth that 1,700 pastors quit each month...and why the truth might reveal a bigger problem.
- The truth about depression from a licensed therapist.
- The common grace of medication for depression and other mental disorders.
- The limitations of ‘biblical counseling.'
- The relationship between your mood, mindset, and motivation.
- How to cultivate self-awareness and empathy as a leader
- The connection between mental health and other areas in the Five Factors framework.
Items mentioned in this episode:
- FREE Download: Five Factors Overview
- Cold Remedy: Umcka ColdCare
- Cold Remedy: Cold Calm Tablets
- Cold Remedy: Yogi Cold Season Tea
- Article: Pastors Are Not Quitting In Droves
- Book: Emotional Intelligence by Daniel Goleman
- Book: Emotional Intelligence 2.0 by Travis Bradberry
- Book: Captivate: The Science of Succeeding With People by Vanessa Van Edwards
- Chart: The Feeling Wheel by Dr. Gloria Wilcox
Thank you so much for checking out this episode of the Five Factors Leadership Podcast. If you haven’t done so already, please take a minute and leave a quick rating and review of the show on iTunes by clicking on the link below. You’ll help us keep delivering life-changing information every week!